//----------------------------\\ Adventures With Grandpa (tm) \\----------------------------// Friday, April 8, 2005 Edition #006 ____________________________________________________________ C O N T E N T S 006.1: Current Condition in Brief A quick summary of Grandpa's current condition 006.2: Marc Abandons Grandpa to Travel the World 006.3: Grandpa Sells House Well, he agrees to put it on the market 006.4: The Spoon Did It! Blame it on the spoon 006.5: Question of the Week "What did Grandpa think of the food at Oakwood care facility?" 006.6: Colophon ____________________________________________________________ 006.1: Current Condition in Brief A quick summary of Grandpa's current condition It's been a while since the last _Adventures With Grandpa_; since he had his hip replacement and was living at the rehab center I figured there wasn't much point in an _Adventures WithOUT Grandpa_, so I declined to produce an issue. Now Grandpa is back home. He's doing well. His mobility is still somewhat limited, but he can walk if he has something to hang onto (a walker or handrails). He's actually more stable than he was before the surgery. His pain is *greatly* reduced. Occasionally he complains of some hip pain in the surgery area, but for the most part he's pain free, which is amazing. What's really incredible is that he can now get in and out of a vehicle without pain, which means he's much more likely to get out and go places. In the past few years it was such a chore that he rarely went out (perhaps once a month). I hope to convince him to get out of the house once or twice a week, simply for the change of atmosphere and fresh air an exercise. He's in good spirits and glad to be out of Oakwood, the care facility where he was for over a month. ____________________________________________________________ 006.2: Marc Abandons Grandpa to Travel the World Yes, I am forced to admit that I left Grandpa in the care facility and took off on a wild spring fling. My trip first took me to Austin, Texas, where I went to the second annual REAL World Conference, an affair devoted to those who use REALbasic. Since I publish a magazine about REALbasic, attendance is practically mandatory. It was a terrific conference; I learned things and made some excellent connections, as well as obtained some good material for future articles. Then I flew to Houston for Easter weekend, where I stayed with cousin Tami, her husband Scott, and Rowan (fourteen months and already almost as I tall I was in third grade). After that it was on to Nashville, where I rented a car and drove to Maryville, Tennessee (near Knoxville) to see my Aunt Joanne (my father's sister) who recently lost her husband. I had a very good visit with her and I'm glad I went. A long drive to Alabama allowed me a brief visit with my Uncle Jack and my cousins Corina and J.J. and their families, but then I had to drive through a thunderstorm to get to Nashville by midnight so I could get a few hours sleep before rising at 4 a.m. to catch my 6 a.m. flight. I flew to San Jose, California, where I stayed with my step-brother Dave Van Wagner and his wife (and Sovie, their rambunctious Golden Retriever) for a few days while I worked with a client of mine. Saturday just happened to be the opening day of the Major League Soccer season, so Dave and I went to watch the San Jose Earthquakes home opener (still my team though I'm far removed now). They dominated the first half and led 2-0 (and should have scored more) but fell completely apart in the second half to finish with a disappointing 2-2 draw. Finally I arrived home last Monday (April 4) after being gone nearly two weeks. While I was gone Grandpa returned to my home. I didn't completely abandon him: my mom was here to care for him while I was away. ____________________________________________________________ 006.3: Grandpa Sells House Well, he agrees to put it on the market It's a sad reality but Grandpa's lovely house on the Oregon coast just isn't appropriate for him any more. It's got too many stairs, there's only one bedroom on the main floor (so a caregiver would be on a different floor), and the layout is not ideal for someone in his condition. Combine that with the fact that there's no one to care for him there (my mom just physically isn't up to it any more) and that Oceanside is so isolated from civilization and the decision is obvious: Grandpa cannot live there and there's no point in keeping the house if he's not going to be able to use it. Of course convincing Grandpa of this is the challenge. Fortunately, though his memory is brief, he's still rational, and though he was not happy, he did understand the situation and finally agreed that it was logical to sell. He even pointed out that in his current situation being at the coast was not that important any more. "It's not like I go down to the beach every day," he said. To my surprise, Grandpa's main concern seemed to be about where he'd live if he sold the house. He seemed relieved and grateful when I explained he'd stay here with me. "You don't mind having me here?" he kept asking and I kept saying that it was a pleasure having him. So earlier this week we went with Grandpa to a notary to have him sign the power of attorney allowing my mom to sell the house. We were a little nervous: with his short term memory, convincing him at one moment doesn't mean he'll remember later. I worried that we'd arrive at the meeting and he'd claim no knowledge of what we were doing and refuse to sign. To offset this, I wrote a short note describing our schedule: 1 p.m. -- Eat shrimp 2 p.m. -- Meet with notary to sign paper to give Carol permission to sell the Oceanside house This proved to be a terrific idea, because whenever he asked what we were doing (he knew something was up but kept forgetting what), I told him to read the note. I wondered if he'd see what he was to do and freak out and say he didn't want to sell the house, but he did not; the note seemed to refresh his memory as to our previous conversation and he seemed okay with selling. The actual signing of the paper took a while. It was a simple one-page contract, but Grandpa had to read it carefully (this made obvious the wisdom of his signing a one-page power of attorney versus getting him to sign a 60-page house sale agreement). The notary was awesome, just giving him all the time he needed, and no one provided any pressure; we just waited and answered any questions. He labored over every word, even finding a few odd legal terms that our notary had to look up in a dictionary! (If you want to know what seisin means, I can now tell you.) He also asked about how he could appoint Carol Van Wagner as his "attorney" if she wasn't a lawyer (explaining this simply meant "representative" answered the question, but of course he came back to this several times, forgetting the question had already been asked and answered). Finally, after about 45 minutes of this, Grandpa set down the paper and picked up the pen. We all watched with bated breath. Then he set the pen down and put his head in his hands as though in great pain. We watched and waited. No one said a word. For a second, I was sure he was going to change his mind and refuse to sign. Then suddenly he opened his eyes, took the pen, and carefully signed his name. It was done, and obviously he understood the magnitude of what he had done. I wondered if he'd remember it later, but at least at that moment there was no question he knew what he was doing. After signing the paper Grandpa seemed relieved and in great spirits. He joked with the notary and seemed pleased. It was obvious a huge burden had been lifted from his shoulders. I think for years he's been torn about the house: he loved it and it gave him security, but at the same time it represented massive complexity, hassle, and was a constant worry. Even during his time at the hospital and care facility he was always asking if the house was okay. Now he's free and can just relax. Our next task is the minor one of actually selling the house! ____________________________________________________________ 006.4: The Spoon Did It! Blame it on the spoon A couple nights ago Grandpa was eating dinner and as often happens, he had too much food on his plate. I encouraged him to eat it by saying, "You put that much on your plate and said you'd eat it." "I didn't do that," he said. "The spoon did it!" ____________________________________________________________ 006.5: Question of the Week "What did Grandpa think of the food at Oakwood care facility?" I asked him that question and got this verbatim response: "Food? Was that food?" This was accompanied by rolling of the eyes and gagging sounds. ____________________________________________________________ 006.6: Colophon Publication Title: Adventures With Grandpa (tm) Frequency: Monthly Price: $1,000,000 per issue Publisher: Marc Zeedar Author: Marc Zeedar Photographer: Marc Zeedar Copyright: Contents (photos and text) (C) 2005 by Marc Zeedar All Rights Reserved Telephone: 877-364-5922 Website: http://www.zeedar.com/grandpa/ To add, remove, or change your subscription details; make suggestions or complaints; report typos or errors; send millions of dollars; or send Grandpa or Marc a comment, send email to . If you'd like to telephone Grandpa (he loves to hear from people and he'll chat like the wind though he won't remember the call ten minutes later), you may call him toll-free at 877-364-5922. ###